Pages

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Back in the Day Take Six: 3/03/2009


If only I knew my one and only would come in the form of a little rugrat with pigtails:

Being single is a lonely business.  It can be nice to have the freedom to do and go as you please, but being void of the intimate companionship that everyone seeks after is tiring.  Then again, love isn’t something you can necessarily seek after and find.  It’s like the old saying: “a watched pot never boils.”  That’s all fine and dandy to say, but do you have any idea how hard it is to NOT look?  It’s like telling someone to not think about chocolate.  Just don’t think about.  Stop it.  Get it out of your head.  You are under no circumstances allowed to think about chocolate.  Did you think about chocolate?  That’s why I can’t stop looking.  Every new person that waltzes into my life stops my heart in anticipation of discovering what the possibilities are.  Of wondering if this is the one.  Does my premature planning before I even really know him make me a little psycho?  I hope not because if it does I am absolutely mental.  But I just can’t help myself!  It’s the curse of a monogamous species.  Always looking for your one and only.  The more time that lapses before finding that person, the more intensely you search.  I like to think that I’m a grounded person.  I am reasonable and have a clear view of reality.  I know my age and my prospects.  I know what I have accomplished and what I still have yet to accomplish.  And I know that when the time comes, everything will fall into place for me.  But sometimes I get tired of the wait.  I want immediate gratification.  I want love and to be loved.  I want my life to start.  So is it strange that my mind is always filled with daydreams of what might transpire?  Does it make me crazy that I have planned a future with the most remote of men?  Am I alone in my unquenchable need for more?

No comments:

Post a Comment